What Would I Do?

That is a question I ask myself a lot lately.  Ever since Nikki and I found out we are expecting, I look at things with that question floating above it. 

Sandra Cantu

Sandra Cantu

The latest story that got me thinking is the one about the 8 year old California girl that was abducted and later found stuffed in a suitcase, dead.  Here is the MSNBC story.

I put myself in the parents shoes and wonder how I would react, and that is what worries me.  When one of my baseball players gets into a situation ie: getting run over, purposely getting thrown at, being accused of something, etc. I can go a tad over the top in protecting and defending him.  I’ve pulled my team off the field before because of the actions of another team.  I mean, these are just my players for four months a year.  They’re not even my blood. 

People have been joking with me since we found out we are having a daughter.  Laughing about my reaction when her first date shows up at our house.  Or the first time she gets dumped. Yada yada yada….

  My biggest worry though is something like what happened to the Cali girl.  I am terrified about that scenario and my reaction.  I don’t know if I could contain myself if confronted with this or if I am  confronted with the accused. 

Obviously, this is a worst case scenario and the odds are so minuscule.  There were bigger concerns with us having a daughter other then the fact of the lighter issues(softball player, being stuck at dance recitals, playing w/ dolls, the teenage years) but a horror like an abduction was the real reason.

I guess the only thing I can do is love her with all my being and do everything in my power to shield and protect her.  I can’t imagine living through a horror like that and my views on stories like this have certainly changed.  They used to be just video and sound.  Just people crying to a camera.  Now, I can see myself in these people.  I can see myself in these situations, and that scares me to the core.


2 Responses to “What Would I Do?”

  1. Jay's Mom Says:

    And now you are getting an idea of why I was ‘so much more protective than other parents.’ I believe this is how you portrayed your growing up to me in an earlier conversation. Good parents struggle with this from day one. If luck, fate, and good training all converge to allow kids to grow up safely, then all is fine. When forces work the opposite way, parents feel the ultimate failure in not always being able to protect their kids … and this does not go away after they become adults. Still, none of this fear or anxiety beats out the shear joy of seeing that first smile or step, hearing that first cry and word, or watching the first time your kid’s bat swings around to make good solid contact.

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